I never really knew what Christianity was when I was still young. It was just recently that I knew more about Jesus as Christ, and that I accepted Him with all my heart as my personal saviour. Since I was young, I lived accordingly to what is the standard of Good against what is the standard of Evil. Did I go to church? Yes. Did I listen to the priest? Yes. Did I understand the gospel? Well, what I understood in general was just to be good in everything you do and you shall go to heaven. Little do I know that there is more to that. The first book I've read in the bible was the book of John. Upon reading, I learned that through Christ men will enter the kingdom of God; and "through Christ", means believing Jesus as the Son of God and following His teachings - teachings that are not of His own but are of sent by God. I often define 'good' as the absence of evil, and 'evil' as the absence of goodness. I never gave a serious thought of what was meant of a sin. As long as I'm not hurting anybody, I'm doing good. As long as I'm being friendly, I'm doing good. As long as I am making everyone feel happy, I'm doing good. However, this is not the only teaching that Jesus taught us in the bible. Needless to say, I am shameful to admit that I never really cared about committing sins because I didn't find a big deal out of it and I know little about what it is written in the bible. But now, after committing to read the bible everyday, everything has changed. After having read the passage of John 9:41, that says, "If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now that you claim you can see, your guilt remains", I felt a heavy armlet of truth and wisdom locked to both of my arms. There is no turning back now, and there is no such sayings as "I was ignorant". Those who sinned will be judged on the day of His coming and so I am to be judged with the sins I am now guilty of having committed against His name. The second book I read was the book of Isaiah, but I stopped because it was too hard to understand. Too hard for my comprehension, that is. And so to proceed, a friend suggested the book of Matthiew - which is what I am currently reading. In Matthiew, although I haven't finished reading it yet, I read more about the ministry of Jesus. Here, it clearly states the teachings of Christ of what has to be done on earth in order for us to enter God's kingdom. The beatitudes - I'm still half of it and as I read them one-by-one I fear more and more. I fear that for every passage that is revealed to me, I will be pleaded as guilty. I now fear of what's in store for me because of my sins. For everyone who sins breaks the law; in fact, sin is lawlessness (1 John 3:4). So, can I still enter the gates of heaven even if I sinned? Can I still be saved? The church teaches, repent! The bible teaches, repent! And as Jesus preached, "Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near". Repentance, a friend told me, is to ask forgiveness for an act of sin and never look back to do the same sin. Indeed, ignorance of the law is not an excuse. Now, I can't say "I never really knew" as my excuse. As Jesus said in John 15:22, "If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not have sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin".

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